Next month is my little loves birthday, but I am dreading it. My heart hurts so badly. January 23 is supposed to he both of my girls days, but we lost Eden very early on. I know that I should be happy and excited about 1 whole year of Aspen's life, but I'm sad today. I didn't know that this would hurt. I just want my babies... I want both of my babies.

I only got to hear Eden's heartbeat once. I only got to see her tiny body one time. I don't even have a video of it. I can't even go back and listen to my girls hearts beat together. They were always supposed to be together..