It’s been a tough year; And the holiday season even tougher. You see, I don’t get a fist Christmas. I don’t get joking that they’re my “turkey” on Thanksgiving. I don’t get birthdays or parties. I don’t get random “selfie” photoshoots. I don’t get waking up at 4 am, for the hundredth time tonight. I won’t get holding each other close. I won’t get anything. I’m left with few memories and such a brutal ending. And I know, I’m “still young” and can “try again,” it’s rare to have it happen “more than once or twice,” or that there’s “always next time.” But, I wanted this time. Right now, “next time” doesn’t matter, because I didn’t get this time.