Hi ladies. I’ve only been engaged for 3 months but everything has became crazy stressful since we got engaged. Long story short I’ve known him since 2008, we dated on and off since 2011, and got engaged October of 2019. I think he knew if he didn’t propose to me that I was probably going to leave him because that’s a long time to wait. He was all of my 20’s, I am now 30 and he is about to be 33. After we got engaged it was like he expected me to pay for literally everything since he spent all his money on my ring. Not my fault he went over budget. He didn’t want to tip the mechanic or buy his family holiday gifts, we wanted to do a lot of fun winter things in the city, so I had to pay for everything. We got into a fight December 20th that dragged out until December 25th. Then he didn’t talk to me for 5 days and asked why I was ignoring him. We got into an even bigger fight and the last thing he said to me was that he didn’t want to talk to me. So we haven’t talked in a week. We don’t live together but prior to this we’ve never gone a day without texting. I’ve been home with the flu so I can’t even drive by his house or see what he’s up to. But I logged into his google history and he’s been on pornhub pretty much every single day and night for the last at least month. We haven’t had sex in almost a month. I can’t tell him that I know he has a porn addiction because I cant incriminate myself. I froze my eggs and gained some weight and I am worried he’s not attracted to me anymore. His communication sucks. I think he has cold feet and doesn’t want to make any more plans. I think he thought he could just propose to me to shut me up but he didn’t realize the gravity of the situation and that there would be future plans. I know this all sounds so extremely childish but this is just the basics. There’s a lot more details but Glow won’t let me make a post that long because I tried. If any of you ladies have been in a similar situation before of your man getting cold feet and giving you the silent treatment and stonewalling you, please tell me nicely how you dealt with it. I’m not here for bashing or criticism. He told me he didn’t want to talk to me so for now I’m respecting his wishes until I figure out how to proceed. I feel like he is really immature and I can’t change him and these red flags about his cheapness make me wonder how we could ever share a mortgage or a baby. He wasn’t this way before we got engaged and we used to be on the same page and now we are not. Getting engaged ruined everything and it has not been a happy time. I tell everyone that wedding planning gives me anxiety so for now we don’t have plans because we will probably just do justice of the peace but the truth is I don’t know if we will even make it to a wedding day. But if we don’t then I feel like everyone will say I told you so because our relationship has always been rocky. I feel like maybe he has cold feet and he’s showing me a side to him that I don’t like so I will end it and he can get the ring back and feel better financially. We’re in NY so since he proposed to me on our anniversary technically if he ended it with me I could keep the ring. And yes I am really thinking about the logistics of this. I picked out my ring. And I also paid for our wedding bands. I’m just really annoyed that all he’s been doing since December 20th is playing video games, watching YouTube videos about the video games, and jerking off to porn. He’s not even googling how to try to fix things with me. There’s been 2 nights where he didn’t jerkoff to porn which were weekend nights so it makes me think he was out fucking someone else. I have the key to his place and I know his passcodes for everything but I haven’t gone snooping because I have the flu. I know this all sounds crazy and I shouldn’t be snooping and I should talk to him, so please don’t lecture me about that. I truly do love this man and wouldn’t have fought so hard for 11 years to get him if I didn’t. But his weird actions lately are causing me to have doubts and second guess our relationship. Help.