I have struggled with depression for as long as I can remember.

The dark would creep in, take over. Make me feel crazy.

I was... I AM ashamed. I am ashamed at how weak I was and am. I was able to push back that darkness for years. About 10 years.

The last 2 years, it started creeping back in, like a slow moving storm that actually takes you by surprise.

I havent been myself for quite a while. I feel it. I know it's TRUE. Yet, I have been powerless to stop it from taking over my mind. I felt as if I was watching it unfold in front of me but could do nothing about how out of control I was becoming.

Tonight, I finally opened up to my husband about my pain, fears, struggles, how weak I have been feeling, how sad I am and how I feel hopeless.

And the weight that has lessened from my mind and my heart has been a breath of fresh air almost.

I am going to be seeing someone soon because I haven't been the best version of me that I can be. I am 8 months pregnant and I am scared that I literally am crazy

.. and ashamed that I feel looked upon as that way. Why do we have to be made to feel that way for feeling depressed/sad/hopeless? Why do we have to hide it and bear that burden on our own??