So am in a long distance relationship leading to marriage soon

Unfortunately we get to see each other once a month for now due to his work

He works As a field engineer and he travels a lot

But we made a deal that we don’t masturbate alone

So today I really wanted to do it and he’s sleeping so I did

I feel bad about it but am afraid I tell him and he’ll get upset

And plus we decided to have sex when we get married so it’s a bit hard

Also he really like to have an orgassim on the phone since he says it’s not nothing compared to face to face and he really enjoyed it more when we’re together But when I really want to have phone sex he tries his best to make me come

And he make sure that I do which satisfies him

And I feel lucky that he’s this way

But now regarding the masturbating I don’t know

I don’t wanna feel like I betrayed him