I need help... I’m in love

I’m in love with my best friend... Ok so we’ve been best friends(c) for about a year now but when we started getting close I was with my bf(k) of nearly 2 years but I started getting feelings for (c) and I tried to control it but it wouldn’t stop this was going for about 3/4 months but I was still with my bf not telling him anything about it I eventually tried to come clean to my bf and we took a “break” got back together soon cause that shit hurted I was still having feels for c and came clean to him he said he’s had feelings before but we don’t wanna ruin our friendship I was constantly thinking of other people and it pushed me to the line I broke up with my bf but I got really hurt and c supported me through everything eventually c told me he was leaving to go to a different school for baseball so I started talking to my ex again and we got back together sadly I was still thinking of other people and I fell out of love I tried to fix it but I couldn’t and we kept getting in little petty fights I was sick of this bullshit so I explained it to him and broke up with him again but we had a pregnancy scare after we broke up so he supported me and went through it all with me sadly I wasn’t pregnant and then he got with my closest friend at the time I was pissed I lost 2 friends in less then 2 weeks I was livid but I was hurting bad and I realized how happy I was with him and I was in love just distracted so I told him and we talked for a bit but while we were talking c came back to school I was so happy I thought I could fix shit and find new happiness so we got back together again but we kept fighting and I completely lost love for him of course I love him but I wasn’t in love with him so we broke up for the last time now me and c got some back lash but we didn’t care we stayed by each other he’s explained we couldn’t be together because we didn’t wanna mess up our relationship but we both keep messing around and flirting with eachother what am I supposed to do ?! Someone please help no hate plz