January 1st of 2018 during our vacation trip I found I was pregnant, a week later at the doctor I miscarriage at 6 weeks. I had my doctor place a IUD on, decided to take it out on December/2018.

January we found out that we were expecting again, I went to my second ultrasound, everything looked great, all good news, we saw our baby’s heartbeat, we were so happy and numb still from the exciting news... 3 days later I started bleeding and yeah, another miscarriage, when I was about to turn 8 weeks.

The day before we took my dad out for dinner, I’ve never seen him so happy and enthusiastic. This would be his first grandkid...

This last loss felt so much stronger than the first one, I was so ready and happy to be a mom and to make my husband and we were TTC, I have days and days, days I feel like I just want to be dead ( I know it is a very bad way to describe things, but it is the truth) and days I’m just ok.

My husband is also healing from our loss, he’s the reason why I could see myself having kids at this time, I’m “young”, turning 26 this year. So breaks my heart even more to see how hurtful it was and still is for him.

My OBGYN told us we should not get pregnant right after, we were supposed to wait for my second ovulation, since the walls of my uterus would be to thin from the miscarriage. Here is where I would love to have some OPINIONS from YOU ladies!

It is so scary and gets me anxious to think about TTC again, just to think that I could also loose another baby, or that I won’t be able to have a kid of my own... Clearly I don’t have any problems to GET pregnant but I’m afraid, even tho my doctor said that she does not think I have a problem. Anyways it is want me and my husband want right now.

I have seen SO MANY stories about so many women getting pregnant RIGHT AFTER the miscarriage, women that did not even had a period before getting pregnant again, and most of them had the bless to go through and have a beautiful baby.

What did you guys do or what do you guys think should be the best way to deal with it? Thank you for your time and patience, it means a lot for me.