Help lol

I’ve been masturbating for many years now but I’ve only used a pillow Bc it doesn’t feel as good with my hands and I can’t take penetration Bc it hurts. But I’m getting tired of the pillow so I need some suggestions plz!! I’m too young to buy a vibrator and I really don’t know what else to do. I want fo explore myself more but there’s not much that feels good to me.. :/