so FRUSTRATING! šŸ˜¢

so i have identified as asexual for about 4 years now (iā€™m 21), and i have yet to find a serious relationship because of my sexuality. living in a world where majority of people are quite literally obsessed with sex, makes my life complicated and leaves me feeling lonely.

i am an attractive woman, which makes things really difficult because people see me in a sexual way because of my attractiveness. when i go out i try to dress conservatively so people donā€™t get these thoughts in their head about me. i feel extremely uncomfortable when people talk about sex around me and sometimes i even feel grossed out or embarrassed.

finding love has been THE MOST difficult thing in my life, when i start to like a guy and tell him that iā€™m asexual, they never talk to me again. itā€™s like all i am worth is sex. they donā€™t give a shit about my personality. itā€™s heartbreaking. i even went on a dating app and added photos not showing any of my body and only my face and the bio saying ā€œnot looking for anything sexual/hookupsā€ to really get my point across. every guy i swiped on swiped me back, which i was surprised about, but ended up with so many of them talking about how sexy i am, and asking me to come over etc. what donā€™t you understand buddy?

oh and to top it off, none of my friends understand me, sometimes even think iā€™m not being serious or that itā€™s a joke. some tell me that iā€™ve just never had good sex and iā€™ll find it one day, or telling me things i need to try. wrong, because i have never had a sexual thought my whole life.

anyone else had these experiences or just felt lonely or like youā€™ll never find love? has any ace found another ace and been in a happy romantic relationship? i donā€™t want to be lonely forever šŸ˜¢ sorry this was so much to read, just had to get it off my chest as not a single person in my life understands me!