Severe Postpartum Anxiety

So I have severe anxiety after having my daughter as my doctor put it I have zero coping mechanism, I am taking medication but counseling is difficult due to covid-19 getting an appointment is difficult but the thing is my 3 year old daughter is suppose to get surgery to fix her teeth, they need to put her under anesthesia and it is 8 days away I am already freaking out thinking if my something happens to my daughter I would kill myself and it’s so scary I know her dentist said it was super safe I just feel like what if we are that percentage that my daughter does or gets brain damage I’m trying to hold it together but it is so difficult my brain is going to a bad place, what am I suppose to do my daughter getting surgery is happening 2 months after I gave birth to my daughter,I am in such a dark place I have tremors and even put on 3 different medication and I am asking for help and calling for a counselor/ therapist but the appointment are so booked, I don’t know what to do even thinking of asking a doctor to sedate me during the time my daughter gets surgery because I’m thinking I will have a major panic attack and I know I’m so selfish thinking of myself why can’t I be strong for my daughters like my husband I’m such a failure as a person I’m a piece of shit