I have always wanted to be a part of my older sisters life. To feel like she actually was my big sister. My entire life she has always acknowledged my friends as her younger sister but never me.

I thought as we got older and I tried to include her in my life more that she would do the same. But she always values her friends more.

I even had her as my maid of honor for my wedding — my mother’s request because “I only have one sister” I didn’t even get asked to be in hers. I know it’s her choice but it still stings. But I’m not mad all I really wanted was to be included in the family pictures like I exist in her life.

I had a baby recently and still planned to go to her wedding even though it’s in a different state. Then covid happened. And the gathering restrictions. Making it so I no longer could attend. But I was told that’s ok. Someone will FaceTime me or something so I could at least watch the wedding from home.

Well I’ve been trying to get in contact with anyone that is going —her friends/my parents. No one has answers for me. They are all too busy. I get it. But it really hurts. I don’t think I’ll even be able to watch over the phone at this point

It starts in 30 mins and I have no clue what’s going on for me to watch like I was promised.

Oh well it’s not my day. It’s not about me. I’m just hurt to be left out of my only sister/siblings wedding. But it’s her day. I just want it to be however she wants.

My family is also trying to pressure me into making her godmother of my child for the same reason if she’s my only sibling. And I’m having a really hard time with it because I’m tired of trying to include her and make everyone happy when she can exclude me from everything on her life.