So, my husband and I traded places due to the quarantine. I used to stay home while he was working then, he got laid off and I got hired for a job in the same day. I worked myself to exhaustion and had no energy to cook or clean and I told my husband that these are his duties now that he's home. I taught him how to do everything and how everything is meant to be. I spent the first week giving him a chore list so that he knew what needed to be done throughout the day and week. I thought that he was accomplishing them fine as I came home to a seemingly clean house. I gave him alot of praise and thank yous and I brought him home little gifts to show that I'm proud of him and the work that he's putting in. I gave him plenty of positive reinforcement and encouragement.

I found out that I was pregnant the day after I got hired on and was ecstatic. We settled into a routine and all was good. Well, over the weekend, I had to quit my job because it was way to strenuous on my high risk pregnancy. I was on bedrest for a few days and it was the first time in a long time, that, I spent at home longer than, a quick amount of time to sleep and eat. I noticed that the bedroom was a bit messier than usual but, I didn't mind it much because he had to pick up the slack on the chores that I was doing due to me being on bedrest. He was very sweet and attentive during that time.

Today is my first day off of bedrest and I noticed that the house was a bit messy so I said that we needed to start cleaning. He sighed and got up and waited for direction on what to do instead of just doing it. I told him to go clean the kitchen while I cleaned the living room. I start cleaning things and I'm noticing trash and junk stuffed everywhere. Nothing was where it was supposed to be. He had my coasters strewn all across the house too which I'm particular about because they're easily lost.

In the midst of looking for them, I stopped at my desk to sit down and straighten it up. I go to put a file in a one of my drawers and, as soon as I open it, a bunch of trash and misplaced items pours out of it! I open the other drawer and it's the same thing. I start sorting through it and am thoroughly annoyed. I start noticing extremely important paperwork shoved in mountains of trash. Some of them were government letters that needed to be responded to immediately that were very old. I was livid at this point!

I asked him why he did this instead of telling me about the paperwork. He didn't respond and just kept scrubbing a single knife. I asked him why trash and junk was shoved in my well organized desk and he said that he was cleaning my desk off. I had asked him to clean it off one day because he started dumping trash and loose items on it. I meant that he needed to put everything where it belonged. I explained that shoving things in hidden places where I couldn't see them is not cleaning.

He ignored me again. I asked him why he didn't put things up properly and why he didn't clean the bathroom a week ago like I asked him to. I asked if he was the reason why the medicine cabinet was so messed up and why everything was always out of place. He just kept ignoring me. I asked him to put down the knife and have a conversation with me. He rolled his eyes and sighed then continued to ignore me but, put down the knife. HE THEN STARTED SHOVING KITCHEN ITEMS IN HIDDEN PLACES RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME!!!!

I asked him what he was doing and he just looked at me and said, "idk". I told him where the items went and he ignored me before trying to put dirty items back into drawers and cabinets. I told him that he needed to clean them first. And he ignored me again. I asked him if he knew where things went. He said that he did. I asked him if he needed direction on where things went. He said no. I asked him to have a conversation with me. He ignored me again. He opened the bread cabinet to put bread away and I saw a stack of moldy bread that he couldn't bother to throw away. I was disgusted. He fed my pregnant ass that bread when I was having morning sickness! I grew very angry and told him to throw it away.

I asked him why the dirty knife was still on the counter instead of in the dishwasher and he huffed and said, "Because you were bitching at me to stop so I did.". I lost it. I started yelling and said that I was trying to have a conversation. He scoffed. I said, "Do you really think that I'm a bitch for asking you to do things properly!?". He just looked at me like I was the worst bitch in the world. I told him that I had depended on and trusted him and he violated that. I let him know that I was hurt. He ignored me again. I asked if he cared at all about my feelings and he rolled his eyes. He said, "I'll clean the bathroom after the kitchen.". I said that, I don't care about that right now. I said that I want to have a conversation about why he's doing this. He said that I was bitching again and I lost my temper and said, "fuck you" through tears and ran to the bedroom crying.

I know that the last bit was hormonal because, I usually keep a level head in these kinds of things but, I was so hurt. I was vulnerable and I depended on him to do his part to take care of our family and instead, he sat on his ass playing video games all day ignoring everything around him. He spent all of this time lying to me.

All I can think about is how he might act this way when the baby comes. I'm heartbroken that I can't trust him. I heartbroken that he can talk to his pregnant wife that way without having a real conversation. I'm hiding in the bedroom now because I'm trying to collect my emotions. I can't stop crying.

He's in the bathroom "cleaning" it now as a big show. He always puts on a big show like this when he does something wrong but, won't have a conversation about it unless I force him to. I just don't have the emotional energy to force the conversation right now. I shouldn't have to put all of my emotional energy into this. He was doing so good on communication and we were working really hard on this for months and months. Our marriage has been so good! Why the sudden change!? What happened to my honest, sweet, hardworking husband? The man that I saw today was not him. I just don't know what to do at this point. Please offer up some advice. Thanks in advance everyone.😥😔

P.S. The hurt comes from violated trust, a lack of communication on his part and, the name calling. The cleaning isn't my main concern.