Hey, I’m just looking for any advice, I’m really lost.

I have 4 kids, 3 boys (1,3,5) and 1 girl, shes turning 8 in November. She’s always been very strong-willed, stubborn and head strong, she absolutely hates not being in control of anything. I feel like we are constantly in a power struggle, over anything, I could say something and she has to say or do the opposite or prove me wrong. I will tell my sons something and my daughter will be there like ‘you have to do this or that’. She lost her ever loving shit today because she came down with lip gloss on to go out in, the rules I have on makeup is she can play with it at home but she does not wear it in public, she’s too young. She hit me and screamed at me and pushed to try and get her makeup off me.

All my kids go to bed at 7, she can watch tv for 1/2 hour to 1 hour depending on wether she has school, but she will constantly come down, I feel like she thinks she’s the same as her dad and I, instead of a kid. She’s always telling me she’s moving out when she’s 18 so she can have her house the way she wants it, because she likes to move things round in our house to where she likes things, she says she can’t wait to be an adult. She listens to her dad alot more, and it’s making me feel like she really dislikes me, it hurts. I take away tv or electronics when she’s acting up, but her dads more lenient where he will give her the tv for 20 mins for a peaceful life which causes us to have tension. I feel like I’ve tried and tried and I don’t know what to do anymore, I want us to have a close mother/daughter relationship and it’s not there, I love her so much and I want her to slow down and not grow up so fast like she wants to.