Back story: I’m in a relationship with a man who has a child in another country. Before getting his ex knocked up he had plans to leave her and move to another country. Just before he’s ready to leave she’s pregnant. He stays with her and the kid for three years and then due to their break up he packs up and goes to live his dream in another country. Far away from his 3 year old daughter.

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I’ve really been thinking lately of what the future hold for this relationship I’m in.

Honestly I couldn’t understand how he could leave his daughter and not want any custody or even to be in the same country as her. He speaks to me of how important family but look at what he’s done for the family he created.

I’ve met his daughter and have seen him as a father. He has no idea of what it is to be a parent. He knows nothing about kids. His mom and dad raised the child with him and his ex as they all lived in the same house.

We went to the beach and he wasn’t even watching his daughter who was alone in the water. He was on his phone the whole time. At one point he asks me to watch her as “he gets distracted when on his phone.” Honestly wtf?! He was late dropping her off to school everyday and 3 hours late picking her up from her moms because he was with the boys.

When I try to speak to him about his daughter, why he left and didn’t want custody he gets so worked up and we argue.

I feel sad for the child. And I feel some resentment towards him.

I think of what will happen if I choose a future with this man. Will he pack up and leave if we have a kid because he’s scared of committing to a child?

He always talks of a future of him bringing his daughter to Australia but never includes me in this future.

He wants to apply for a partner visa with me. And at first I wanted to with him but now all I see is someone who’s just using me for a visa. And someone I have no future with.

Advice? 💛x