Last year we lost our baby, after 3 years of trying to convince. I took it a lot harder then I should of. Quit my job, didn’t leave my bed/couch. Didn’t keep up with the house work. Spent way too much money on weed and alcohol. Didn’t love myself or my husband the way I should of. Felt sorry for myself and ignored the people who loved me. Struggling with depression and Suicidal thoughts. Ended up having our home sold and having to move on the due date of that child. We moved and I continued to drink and smoke too much feeling like I didn’t deserve my husband or my life because I couldn’t bring one into the world... Last year I almost divorced my husband because he deserved to be a father, he deserved someone who wasn’t mad at him all the time for things not working out.

This year, I get to bring home a already beautiful little girl to a safe home, in a safe car. This year I get to love my husband and myself more. This year I get to be a mother to a little girl. This year I get to hold the person who saved me and bring her home. This year I’ve been sober since we found out we were expecting. This year I get raise a little girl that saved me. I’m not going to be a perfect mom, I’m going to mess up. I will try my hardest and love this little girl with ever ounce of me. I will get to love this man who I’ve always wanted and needed. I will get to watch him be a father. This year I get to give birth to a Valkyrie. I love you Freyja May-Lee so much. Thank you.