Can you relate to this?

Question

My husband hates being told what to do but I honestly feel like he puts me in the position where I have to say something. For example, taking juice out the fridge and not putting it back, walking on the carpet with his shoes ( I take pride in cleaning and taking care of our things), not putting the top back on stuff. Yeah, it’s small stuff but these things add up. For women who’s lived with someone for a long time, do these bad habits change?

Answer

It’s all ridiculous that we even have to tell or remind guys to do something. Grown ass men lol like come on! Like after you make a sandwich wipe your damn crumbs off the counter lol takes two seconds.

Answer

Apparently, I'm the husband in my relationship. 😂😂😂

This is going to be unpopular opinion. But, I can see things from the other side:
 Everyone has their own way of doing things. There is no right or wrong way of doing things. Married or not... people are allowed to think for themselves. My husband nags constantly... You didn't load the dishwasher right, you didn't fold the towels correctly, you cooked with the wrong pan, etc etc etc. Total OCD.
I can't stand someone trying to manipulate how I do things. If I pay bills, wash laundry & keep our home clean. Who cares how it gets done.

Answer

Maybe I'm a husband bc I do this all the time. I swear I don't do it on purpose, idk why I forget small things.
I did start checking lids before I put things away. It's like my brain was like yup this is on perfectly! But my husband would be like hey you forgot to do this. 😅

Answer

The more we talk about the things that bother us, the better they get. Communication is key, as is a desire to make the other person happy! That said, we will be having these same conversations for the rest of our marriage, just less and less frequently, because old habits die hard, and we each have our own priorities.

Answer

I think a lot of men are like this. At first i would say babe please put stuff back. Then he said it felt like i was nagging him and complaining about every little thing. Which made him feel like he was walking on egg shells. I started taking it in a different approach. Hey babe if you will throw your clothes in the basket i can wash them. Or hey babe can you clean the kitchen for me while i get the bathroom. Otherwise it's like im mothering him and no man likes that. Just learn what works for him.

Answer

They change sometimes and depending on the thing. At times his bad habits would go away for weeks or months and then he'd have moments of doing them again and then they would leave either with or without a reminder

Answer

My boyfriend and I are pretty open with things like this like hey it would be better if instead we did this. Example: hey I think if we have extra meatballs it would be better if we packaged them and put them in the fridge or get rid of them instead of leaving them on the stove over night for the cats to play with and fling around the apartment. So we’ve decided to be more quick on putting food away. We’re both guilty of not wanting to put leftovers away but the meatballs were all him 😂 anywho I digress. If he hates being told what to do maybe make it more of an idea that’s better then his method if that makes sense. Maybe explain why it would be better if he didn’t wear his shoes on the carpet or if he put the juice away. Like in an educational this is why I like to do this way not in a you do everything wrong way? If that makes any sense?

Answer

Yup it’s like he asks me 100 questions in a row basic shit what needs to happen and then when I tell him how to do something next min he acts like I’m telling him what to do all the time

Answer

I think whether you're married or just living with someone sometimes it's hard to go from what you're used to, to dealing with how someone else is.
Okay they might be small issues but it's still important to communicate how they make you feel, he might not change but voicing it will at least make him aware that it bothers you at least

Answer

My husband is the saaaaaame way. Leaves the bread open... Leaves his tools everywhere... Tears open the mail and leaves the garbage all over the table.
If I'm good about being on his case, I'm sure he'd improve. I just hate nagging him and it gets to the point where I just take care of it 😂 but I know if I were to remind him every time he would probably maybe improve these things? He does the same thing with me on stuff I do that bothers him like leaving cabinets open and not putting dishes straight in the dishwasher 🤷‍♀️ I think it's worth a shot to tell him "hey id really appreciate it if you can put the juice away when you're done so it doesn't go bad" and then remind him every time until he gets it

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