Stuck on stupid

This is a complicated story but I’ll try my best to explain. I was talking to this guy let’s call him Sam and we were headed towards a relationship but I felt like I wasn’t being respected so i ended things and we kept things causal (we were still hooking up). I’m not the type that is okay with having sex with someone without a relationship. So I decided to get back with my ex who we can call Jay. The reason Jay and I broke up was because he moved over 1000 miles away. We tried long distance but it didn’t work out. I’ve always loved him so I was willing to try again. Unfortunately, it didn’t last long because of the quarantine and I got tired of waiting to finally see him again and I didn’t know when that would be.

So while all of this is happening Sam and I start talking again and eventually we start hooking up again. It was a mutual friends birthday and we decided to go over to Sam’s place to celebrate. This is when I discovered he had moved on and started dating someone else because she was at the party. I was heartbroken because obviously he was seeing her while seeing me as well. I cut off all ties with him but his friend talked to me and suggested we make up because Sam was in his feelings and so was I. So I decided to forgive him and stay friends but it’s really hard to do because that attraction is still there and the sex is great.

I tried to talk him into breaking things off with her because he’s known me longer and he doesn’t seem that into her but he said he can’t do that because they’ve already bonded. So while I know what’s going on she’s totally clueless and in love with him. She even posted him for his birthday. I feel bad because I know what we’re doing is bad but I at same time I’m trapped for the moment and I can’t get out.

Also I went through their messages and she said something about being pregnant and I’m guessing she had an abortion because they both don’t want children. So I understand they may have bonded over going through that together.

I don’t know if I should tell her because she’s totally clueless and thinks we’re just friends I also stupidly don’t want him to hate me because he’s helped me grow so much.