Chemical again πŸ˜”πŸ’”

Going through my second chemical again. It hurts so bad. Idk why God keeps torturing me like this. Why me? Why am I not deserving of being a mom? I don’t get why I have to find out that I’m pregnant just for me to lose it. It’s not fair at all. I had one on 3/23/20 and now today I’m going through it again. I was supposed to be due on 3/23/21 πŸ’” I prayed every night for this baby and I lost it again. I’m just so devastated and heartbroken. I feel like I’m never gonna get my rainbow baby.