Episiotomy with 2nd?

So I had my son 2 years ago and I’m 35 weeks now . I’m terrified to give birth again 😭 my first son was 8lbs when born and I had to get an episiotomy , I guess the medicine did not numb me fast enough because I felt when he cut me it was very traumatic. I had rough healing process because I was so sore and scared to poop . Of course i finally fully healed and i was fine and back to normal but it took a while . We this this time I have gestational diabetes and they are so strict on me eating no sugars because they don’t want baby to be so big he can’t get out . Smh . Im terrified . I really hope my waters break on it’s own and he comes out no problem but hey you never know . But anyways have anyone had an episiotomy before or tore really bad ? How was it delivering ? How was the healing process?