A little time for me to gather my thoughts

My now husband and I had been on and off for about 11 years now.

We were having a nice night and he asked if I remember when we ate at Chili’s for the first time... *blah blah blah*

Then I asked him what was he thinking when I told him I was pregnant with our now 3.5 year old daughter...

We were engaged when we found out, but he forgot and said. “I don’t think we would be together if it weren’t for Nova...”

This rubbed me wrong bc I took it as we would have called off our engagement and he would have wanted to leave me, but I got pregnant. he was in a fucked up place as far as him needing to grow up and looking back, he wasn’t dedicated to me. Cheating and so on.

He told me that’s not how he meant it... he meant that we wouldn’t have gotten back together after I broke up with him bc I needed time to forgive and grow.

(Btw we have been engaged twice and he is a changed man after I left him for 2.5 years)

I figured I would get over it bc I do believe he didn’t many other EXACTLY the way I interpreted it.

But can anyone relate to gathering your thoughts after your feelings are hurt?

I wasn’t even mad but I just didn’t have much to say at the time to him bc my feelings are still a bit hurt bc I feel like there is a little bit of truth in that bc of how he said it... “not what you say but how you say it.”

I showered and made us desert but now he’s mad at me bc I’m not All happy go fuckin lucky right after... I was simply just quiet for a second will I’m getting out of my funk...

I don’t understand how he got mad and is making this about him??

I hate when people get mad bc they think your mad???

Whenever he’s upset, I talk about it with him and then understand he needs to clear his mind. I I continue to do whatever it is I’m doing and at least sit with him or clean... whatever... until hes back to his normal self. I don’t get mad bc he’s mad 🙄