I really don’t know what to do. I’m trying.

I was with my ex for 5 years and we have a son together. We blame eachother for why we are not together. I was a bitch after how he treated me and my anger toward him was about cheating on me with prostitutes, forcing me to do 3 zones or he would leave me or cheat on me ( he wanted to have sex with other women), and he was not affectionate. Neve said he loved me or I was beautiful or he missed me etc.

It’s been two years and I tried to move on to co - parenting normal but he claim we won’t and can’t be normal. He calls me bitches, curses at me when I’m trying to ask him questions for our son; he doesn’t say hello when he come to my house to lick him up. He does talk to my other children and they don’t talk to him so he calls them rude but he met them when they were 3 and 4 , and they watched him mistreat me. They are only 11 and 9 now and I’m sure they are confused and don’t know what to feel or say when they see him. They use to saw hi but he never looked friendly and they hear my cry over the phone when talking to him because he is difficult to deal with.

It got to the point our 4 year old did not want to see him or call him because he wouldn’t let our child call me when he wanted to call. He was also telling people “ my dada hates my mama”. He is only 4! Why is he teaching our son this!

Recently our son started swimming. It’s $100 per month, in our court papers he is to pay 40% of swimming. Now he is saying he won’t at first shit. If I want money take him back to court. I told him I don’t feel like that drama , he should just follow the court order and oh his half of activities. Then he start to call me a Democratic Mother Fucker ( I just can’t take it ). In the relationships he was verbally abusive but not as bad. It’s only $40 bucks. I asked him to save 10 a week. He claims he is broke cause he pays me child support and he is pissed that he has to pay child support. So he won’t pay anything else as per the court order. I don’t know why he wants court drama.

Then he says he won’t do it b/c I don’t follow parenting time! When COVID started he skipped a month of his parenting time to go to Hong Kong with some girl! He was a nk show for New Years. No show for Father’s Day. Then he works at a bar called “ Polish American Home” and when he has events there , he doesn’t come for him, and expects me to understand cause he has to make money. So I agree. But recently we go camping and it was his parenting weekend and he curse at me and say I screw his parenting time !

Then he calls me a bad mother for not telling our son why he can’t come.

I honestly just want to be normal with him and part of that is because I did really move this man so much. I wanted to marry him and I have him my all until I saw he had a sex and drinking problem but I stayed for our baby. He is Polish and all

He does is curse in Polish, he acts very arrogant , one sided , and like he is the center of the world and I should agree all things he said. I couldn’t anymore- I actually needed personal therapy after dealing with him.

I tried everything to change our sons mind to make him call and visit his dad and told him daddy loves you etc. but my ex comes back and says it’s my fault he is this way and again that I’m shitty mother etc. IM NOT! I know im a very good mother but for some reason when I see my 4 year old , I can’t hate his father. I love my son and I feel like

Hate will affect my little boy. But his father is showing poison. Our son is not even worth $10 a week for swimming but he came to see him swim and wants parenting time - what dad is he ?? He does pay child support, and has every other weekend parenting time and half of activities.

Be he won’t pay activities and parenting time is if he is not busy.

What do I do ??!?