I can’t seduce my husband

Ok. So I’m 28 years old. He is also 28. 4 years married. 3 kids. Dated for 8 years. I feel like I can’t seduce my husband. The reason I say this is because before the kids I could. We had high sex drives. Now it’s like we too distracted to have sex. We can’t get on the same boat when it’s time for sex. Like for me.i have a high morning sex drive that he has now failed to satisfy so I ended up buying a toy. We had argument about it because he was he felt that I didn’t need one and I should wait on him to have sex. But when I do wait on him... he falls asleep after working and I’m up waiting for him horny. I can’t get him right at the door because he all dirty either. So we mostly doing it in the middle of the night and he has to wake me up. I even tried putting on sexy lingerie on several occasion and planning a at home dinner with kids and he just tell me that he just tired. Let him rest and he will meet me in the back. But he falls asleep! At that point, I am very frustrated and annoyed that I don’t wanna have sex anymore. Not to mention I could’ve used the toy if he gonna fall asleep when he come home 🤦‍♀️ so yesterday, I took the kids to my mom so we can have a talk. We talked and he just told me that he getting older and his sex drive is decreasing because of work and stress and to not take it personally. I told him that I understand but it’s also frustrating when you telling me to wait for you and I could at least satisfy my self. We ended up having sex but he ended up having the orgasm before me. He was like “he couldn’t hold it because we waited too long to have sex”. Idk what to do. I’m frustrated sexually. I love my husband but I just him sexually.

How do we get past this?