I'm 19 almost 20 and I'm still a burden on my parents. I'm a useless anxious and depressed freak who literally has no friends.

I have had so many therapist and have tried so much medication.

I've been sent to a mental hospital before and due to my anxiety it was the worst experience ever.

I can feel my self breaking. I know I can't kill myself. It would hurt my family and I just can't do that to them. I love them so much I can't do that to them.

But I'm a useless nobody. They have other kids, they shouldn't have to still be providing for me and yet here I am. An expensive parasite they have grown too attached to to let go.

How can I get better for them when all I can think about is how am I going to kill myself.

I don't know.

I just don't know.