He Cheated & I forgave him. But Did I ?!

Question

A month ago I caught my man texting several different women about sex. I decided to forgive him. I posted it here and I forget what I named it. 
Yesterday, after dinner we decided to take my children (6&3) to the lake to feed the ducks and walk around. At some point we sat down and he asked why haven't I said anything about having another baby. We both made is very clear in the beginning stages of dating that neither of us want more children (aside from mine and his of course). I asked him why was he asking me about that at random and he said we normally joke about it but it hasn't come up in a while. I then said to him "yep. And if you've noticed I don't even talk about marrying you anymore." All he said was oh and we went on with the rest of our night.
I am now wondering if I really forgave him or if I have just stopped caring. I can't tell. That comment I made was so rude but it's the truth. Since he cheated, Marrying him has been the furthest thing from my mind let alone having a baby with him.
I am not angry or bitter btw but how do you know when you are REALLY over it? Healed? Not just suppressing it?
Thanks y'all.

Answer

Is he truly worth it though.

Answer

I don't think a guy who cheats on me is worth my time. That's trash.

Answer

It’s only been a month, I’m sure it’s on your mind constantly if you’re doing the right thing. But if kids weren’t involved, would you have left all together? Think about it. 
I suggest therapy for yourself to really talk it out. You deserve to be happy and you know your not emotionally invested atm. Please put your happiness first and really decide if he’s worth it.

Answer

It seems that you have forgiven him but have you forgiven him enough to eventually let go of what he did? A month really isn't a long time to process in my opinion. Not to move past what happened. It will take time to try and repair/rebuild the trust you had... if you can. My advice, since you decided to give him another chance, is to start dating all over again. Put marriage and definitely kids to the side, while you work on the relationship. This isn't something most can just push to the side and go on like they were before. I would even suggest counseling.

Answer

The trust will never be full back because he betrayed your trust. And you know u say u forgave him but deep down inside I think u know ubhavent because you lost your trust in him. And now not even thinking of the future to me seems ur still upset ur not past it nor who knows if u will ever be past it ask ur self if you can get passed this and also ask is he worth it

Answer

You forgave him... u stayed. But forgiving doesnt mean u ignore all the facts. He got caught. He was Sexting SEVERAL different women. He showing signs of dishonesy, being unloyal, and uncommited to you and the family youve created and the union you share with him.  Is he really going to stop? Has it possibly gone further than what you found? Does he take care of home responsibilities? Is life better with him mentally physically emotionally spiritually and financially. You doing what any wise wimen would. And i suggest you have an exit strategy in case you discover more or this behavior doesnt change.

Answer

I think it’s both - you haven’t forgiven him and you don’t care. He’s obviously paranoid and worried you’ll leave him since he’s noticed you stopped joking about having a baby together even though you both agreed you wouldn’t? It’s kind of a weird thing to point out but it just goes to show he knows you aren’t fully over it.

Answer

You’ll probably never truly be over it. I’d never want to marry him either.

Answer

I think you do love him, you wouldn’t be with him right now, but you didn’t forgive him and you may act like you don’t care and feel like you don’t but you do! he hurt you! He betrayed you! Sometimes us women do that just to kind of have a peaceful relationship. Maybe what you said to him was mean and may have made him realize that “hey I screwed up, I hurt her, she no longer shows affection or interest” and that might make him start doing more for you cause he don’t want to loose you! 
Praying for y’all! 🙏🏼❤️

Answer

Take it from someone who has forgiven it. You never get over it. You never forget. It’ll upset you for the rest of your time together

He Cheated & I forgave him. But Did I ?!

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