I’m not diagnosed with anything and I can’t even go to a doctor/psychiatrist/therapist because of family/financial reasons. All I know is constantly seeing/imagining yourself die in horrific accidents, wanting to kill/hurt yourself, and being so scared you can’t breathe for no reason is not normal.

I keep getting told to force happy thoughts to replace the bad thoughts, create a routine that convinces your brain it’s safe, if you think the floor will collapse: stomp three times, flick the light twice to convince your brain the hanging light won’t fall on you, hum a song so you don’t stick your hand on the stove, pinch yourself twice so you don’t jump out the car onto the busy highway. But I know that these routine-things can lead to ocd, and your brain starts to think that these routines prevent the disasters.

So my choices are: get on medication (I can’t), train your brain into other bad habits(not a great idea), or deal with it silently until it consumes you(probably through death:also not the best plan). Is there anything else I can do? Maybe convince myself into being sane?