Need advice :(

I recently found out that our fourth baby will be a boy! My husband and I are very excited. We had always talked about how if we had a son, he wanted to pass his middle name on (Neil). This is a tradition on his father’s side, and I don’t dislike the name- so I always felt ok with it.

Sadly, my husband’s father passed away in February unexpectedly, and we are still dealing with the emotional fallout of his death and settling his estate. My husband mentioned the other day, that he doesn’t think he wants to use the name Neil anymore, because he has a contentious relationship with his dad’s family- and doesn’t feel like honoring them. He mentioned that he wants to use his dad’s first name as the middle name instead (Edward).

The issue is- I strongly dislike the name. :( Also, I had mixed feelings about his dad when he was alive due to him being an asshole to my husband and sister-in-law, alcoholism, verbal abuse, etc. I’m not sure if I feel 100% comfortable giving his name to our son, even if it’s just the middle name.

My husband is still so heartbroken over losing his dad, and I don’t know how to talk with him about this. It is such a touchy issue. Am I being selfish? Should I just bite the bullet? Should I suggest using Neil again instead? Let me know what you think. I don’t really like any E names, so I don’t really want to use a replacement or similar name instead of Edward either.