First natural period; let’s vent!

Oh dear, am I having a right day of it!

My first natural period in about 14 years.

Yes, 14!! For 14 years I have been loyal to a little pill I took every evening, it regulated my hormones and protected me from pregnancy and oh, did I wanna marry this little pill.

That was until I realized I hadn’t ever lived a life where my body did her natural job.

And since hormones control us , this made me think I didn’t even know who I was.

So, after a whole lot of research I decided to quit the pill and go natural.

Today I regret that choice!

Oh do I regret that choice.

The first weeks off the pill were strange.

It was like my body was in shock and my emotions didn’t understand themselves, let alone each other, creating a very fluctuating person which is me 👋.

I knew this was going to happen, all the forums I found through google had told me that, but somehow I was still surprised.

I guess I’m that fool who decides she ain’t like other people and so things won’t be as bad for her.

Not to self; Well girl, think again you idiot!

The emotions are one thing, I’m lucky to have a man who is very understanding of the impact , hormones have so he is very supportive. But the acne? That’s another one. I feel like I’m 15 again, my face is covered, and having the knowledge of a 24 year old makes me not wanna pop any of these nasty suckers. Quitting the pill is not going to make me end up with acne scars, I already got enough of them. But this results in me looking pretty disgusting.

But again, my very supportive man is being very nice about it and just got me some special cream to fix the problem.

Now let us get to the real issue;

My period.

The forums said your period will most likely become very irregular, or could stay out.

I was looking forward to the staying out part, no periods ? FINE WITH ME.

I guess I don’t belong to the lucky ones, because exactly 21 days after my stopweek finished I got my first, natural, period.

(This is today by the way, only just a few hours ago.)

Now, I want to sincerely apologize to everyone who has ever heard me moan about ; period cramps, the amount of bleeding, headaches or back aches.

I was foolish and did not know what these things even were!

Today I have found out what these ‘symptoms’ mean.

And my days, I am full of regret.

(If you can’t handle certain period talk, you might want to stop here.)

This morning the cramps woke me up, I thought I must of eaten something wrong the day before , because this ain’t right.

Me , and my half asleep head went to the toilet and found ourselves in a blood bath.

I was truly horrified by the amount of blood in that toilet.

Yes laugh at me, I guess 15 years of periods hasn’t taught me jack shit because I did not know how to compose myself.

What is this? Come on now body, contain yourself.. this is Just ridiculous!

I thought a massive tampon,( you know the

ones that are for super heavy bleeders but also make you wonder if it will ever fit), would do the trick.

I popped it in, went downstairs and made myself a nice coffee.

As of today I don’t like coffee anymore; it has made me nauseous.

And nauseous I am.

My head feels like it’s about to blow up, my lower back feels like my 10 year old step son has jumped on it for hours and my belly...

My belly should seriously calm its Tits!

I have not ever, and I mean EVER, had such bad cramps.

I’m laying in fetus position in my bed, with a pillow between my legs, while typing this.

The massive tampon is not doing its job, I have had to add a night pad as well, and I hope this will hold at least another hour.

I feel truly ashamed for any moaning I have ever done. I have said before that some men do not want to understand how much a period can affect you, and that they’re just inconsiderate.

Well I count myself as one of these men now. I used to be able to just go about my day with one paracetamol and a light tampon. I didn’t have anything to moan about and sure did not know there were woman who had it this bad.

I know this is a monthly thing, I know it’s natural, I know you just got to suck it up and go on with your life and I know I have moaned a lot in this post.

But sometimes? Sometimes you need to say your thing, just so you can suck it up and go on with life.

And this sometimes, for me, is right now!