What’s the longest it took you

What’s the longest healing time for a break up, I’m just asking bc I’ve been literally in love with my ex and we broke up 3 years ago , we have a child together idk if that even is a reading for a why I feel like this. We don’t see each other often at all but when we do we end up doing things we shouldn’t. I wish I had self control when it comes to him. I do want to be with him and I know we are ex’s for a reason but idc lol