Husband and Babies

Over the last couple of years my husband and I have had very small, heated conversations about having children. He always pulls out the “I’m not where I want to be in life” card and we decide to not try to get pregnant. The thing is though is that he is the one who is ALWAYS bringing it up! I tell him every single time that I will NEVER force him into having children with me but he has to keep in mind that if he decides that he does want to start trying, that it needs to be very soon. I cannot see myself being as active with my kids in 5 years as I can be now. I don’t want to be the 50 year old mom at high school graduation! It’s just not what I want - not that there is anything wrong with that. He has a daughter who will be 12 any day now! We’ve been together for 9 years and have only tried ONCE (literally. He came inside of me one time on purpose because we “tried” 😂). His fear is that I’ll end up being like his daughters mother and he’ll have to take me to court to see his kids and relive what they’ve gone through - mind you, she was 16 when she gave birth and he was 18 🙄. He’s 30 now!

So the point of my rant is that I feel like it’s selfish of him to continuously bring the topic up and dangle the idea in front of me and then takes it back. He’ll make comments like “I can’t wait to get you pregnant” to “this is why we can’t have kids”. It’s just so frustrating! His #1 priority is making money and trust me- he already makes plenty of it!

I just don’t understand the excuses or why he’s choosing to push it off. Has anyone ever had to deal with this? Any advice on what I should do here?

~ One confused wife.