Hi, I'm looking for a little advice or encouragement.

For about a year and a half I had been praying that I could get pregnant with a boy. This would be my first child but for so many reasons, I really wanted it to be a boy. I finally got pregnant and just yesterday had my gender scan to reveal that I'm having a girl. I was/am soo devastated...so much so I briefly considered having an abortion. Selfish huh? I feel like I would rather not have kids at all than have a girl. When I try to vent to my husband about it, it just turns into an argument. He just keeps saying that this is a blessing from God and I need to be grateful. Everyone else - my family, his family keeps saying the same thing. I'm already so upset and everyone guilt tripping me for not feeling the way I should is just making it worse. I feel like a monster for feeling the way I feel anyway and I dont have anyone supporting my feelings- everyone is just telling me how I SHOULD feel, and that it's not ok to feel how i do. Has anyone experienced this before? If so, how did you deal with it? Sorry, that was a long post but I appreciate any advice, or just some company.