Tired of my husband's negativity

My husband thinks his (self diagnosed) depression gives him the right to just be moody and miserable over literally every single thing and to be a general unhelpful jerk. I have (psychiatrist diagnosed) depression myself, dealt with it for years so I understand that it's hard to be positive but I'm at least grateful for what we have.

He just mopes around the house, doesn't help with ANYTHING, but when a friend calls him to go out then he's amped and pumped and goes without a second thought about me. Or when I'm cleaning, he'll just sit and play one of his gaming consoles and not offer to help at all. He'll come home and I'll still be working, I'll finish and start cooking and feeding the dogs and running around like a headless chicken and he'll just sit there watching TV.

Our one dog chewed a tiny hole in a pair of my husband's shoes and he went absolutely ballistic and I don't know why. This pair of shoes is about eight years old, falling apart by themselves (he wears them as house shoes) and last night he was going to give them to a homeless person but we couldn't even find shoelaces for them. They're in bad shape by themselves but he had a complete tantrum over the little bit our dog chewed. This coming from the man who left a pair of shoes outside in the weather for so long they got sun bleached and grew mildew on them.

His negativity is just getting to me now. He's in his sales slump too and just refuses to look at any of the helpful links I sent him in this regard. Everything revolves around him and making his life easier with no regard to me whatsoever. Then when I get annoyed and tell him off, he gets in his "then why don't you leave? Why are you still here then?" stupid mood.

He also refuses to get any counselling or go to a doctor for any meds. So I told him if he's not going to even try get himself sorted out then he must stop complaining around me. He literally doesn't care about MY mental health at all thar he acts like this and doesn't even help ME with anything yet I'm supposed to be expected to be supportive of a man child throwing a tantrum about tatty, almost decade old shoes.

* @S it is so infuriating. You can't even have a conversation about it. I tried again this morning and he's like, "why must I change? You can pack your bags and leave. Me being a dick is on me, you choosing to stay is on you. I don't care".