What should I say.....

Period 3 days late....my heart s racing and my anxiety is up through the roof! Counting every second and hoping that it stays late...wanting a full week to pass by without a red drop shed! Asking God that this month is IT....dreamed that I am bleeding so heavy but woke up to dryness...got happy for a sec but reminded myself that I shouldn't get excited...too soon to get excited. A few hours later AF showed up and shattered every ounce of hope I held! This is my life for 8 years now! This is how I spend 3 weeks of every month for 8 years now! This is what I live for 8 years now! I am tired of this!