TW: sexual assault

I was sexually abused as a child and have pushed away all guys who have ever liked me so far but now that I’m 17 years old there is a guy who likes me and I like him back but I can already feel myself pushing him away

I don’t know why but as soon as he told me everything came flooding back and I don’t know if that’s normal

I don’t know if I should get into a relationship if it’s made me remember stuff - or maybe it’s good practise and a good way of getting myself mentally prepared for future relationships too?

Any advice?