Venting

My sweet girl will be 18 months in 2 days. I am ready to stop nursing for selfish reasons. I am not losing weight, actually gaining and cannot go back on birth control until she stops. I have PCOS so my weight loss does not happen until I wean and get my hormones under control with birth control. I know I will miss it but at the same time my weight is a sore on my mental health. I dont feel confident or happy anymore. I know bf is short time in the grand scheme but I also dont like that she wants to nurse ALL THE TIME. I feel sad thinking of weaning but I also have a strong urge to quit for myself. Needing encouragement 🥺