Venting//in laws
For starters I’m going to be cross posting this just because I’d like as much feedback as I can get, so I apologize if you see this in a different group as well. I genuinely do not know if it’s my anxiety/overthinking brain getting to me, or if my feelings are valid. If I sound ridiculous please let me know so I can either bring this up to my husband or not, or so I can calm myself down.
To be totally transparent I am 110% grateful for every gift my daughter receives on Christmas, after all it’s about HER and not my feelings of course. But, would you feel like boundaries are crossed, or would you feel like your toes are being stepped on if her grandparents (husbands side) went completely overboard with super expensive presents, would you feel like theyre outshining you guys as the parents/Santa? For context, my mom was so giddy about getting my daughter a really nice play kitchen set for her 2nd birthday in July, she’s gotten all the other grands a kitchen set and she found a super nice one and was really excited about that being her
My MIL knew about this, they talked about it and my MIL was even excited for my mom to get that. Well, guess who went ahead and ordered a $200 one for Christmas anyways!!? My MIL. My moms so upset, and honestly so am I, I feel like a boundary was crossed. On top of this kitchen my MIL got my daughter a mountain of clothes, a ton of extra toys, including a large dollhouse, AND a bumper car. Another interesting tidbit, my MIL knew we only ever talked about getting my daughter a ride on car for Christmas. That was going to be her main gift. She then proceeds to tell me that I do not have to get the car, since she got her the toddler bumper car you can get off of Amazon. My husband agreed with her because we only live a few houses down from her and “we can take the bumper car home whenever we wanted to” (she got it to keep at her house unless we wanted to BORROW it)
So it left me with no ideas about what gifts to get her. I ended up buying this toddler bounce house as her main gift, it was about $65 at Walmart. Guess what my MIL did, went and bought a ONE HUNDRED AND NINETY FIVE dollar bounce house, and told me it was nicer and I can return mine. She then proceeds to tell me to not go overboard on Christmas because there’s going to come a time where we will not be able to? Insinuating that we could end up broke or something? I said “it’s not about how much we spend each Christmas, it’s about teaching her to be appreciative and grateful for ANYTHING she gets, no matter how big or small. She then tells me “you should just let us do the shopping, get her a stocking, and a baby doll or something”
WHAT! I feel like boundaries have been crossed, my feelings are completely hurt, and for what reason? She’s not going to remember this Christmas, shes only 18 months old! But I feel like my toes were absolutely stepped on, and that she is trying to out-do us? Like I said I’m totally grateful for her gifts, this is about HER! But geez.
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