Is it okay for choosing to have kids be a compromise?

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Someone in the relationship is going to be miserable for 18+ years, being forced to have a responsibility they don’t want, and the other is going to feel cheated out of having a helpful partner. I can’t see that going well in the long run.

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I wouldn’t want to risk my partner feeling resentful, unhappy, etc. to me for the rest of our lives if he was choosing to have kids for me

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I know people who chose to have kids only because their partner wanted them, and they absolutely do not regret them at all. Some people don't realize they want kids until they have them 🤷🏼‍♀️

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Kids are not a compromise tool. Not using them against the other, not comprise to get them. I feel both should want one or at least be open to the idea of them..

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If it's a genuine compromise, then maaaybe. Thing is, I'm not really sure you CAN compromise on having kids - you either have them or you don't, it's not like you can just rent them part time, so someone's going to be unhappy. That's not actually compromise, that's just someone giving in, and that's not really a good background for kids.

Is it okay for choosing to have kids be a compromise?

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