My first retrieval I ended up with 2 blasts - a day 5 graded 4AA that was described as “beautiful” and began to hatch after thaw, and a day 6 graded 2BB. I got pregnant with the 4AA but found out today that the heart just stopped. I’ll be going in for a d&c on Saturday. I was 11 weeks 1 day, and they said I was measuring on schedule so it must have just happened.

I’m almost 37 with low reserve and I know that a 2BB is not a great grade - plus it took day 6 to even get there. I’m therefore thinking about talking to my doctor about doing a second retrieval in case I can get any better eggs before trying again. We only want one child but if the 2BB doesn’t work, and I’m not optimistic, I’d have to do it again anyway.

The caveat: I self funded this cycle, and I’m on the wait list for the funded provincial program. They say it can be up to 14 months though and I got on the list in the summer. So I could try the embryo I have and hope that if it doesn’t work my time in the funded program comes up? Or I could just do the retrieval now and hope for the better eggs with a better shot, to avoid having a second miscarriage. I’m fortunate to have good insurance and financial resources so while I don’t have $20k to throw around, I care most about getting pregnant and am willing to spend what I have to to make it happen soon.

Thoughts? What would you do? I’m writing this in a brain fog, still carrying my angel pregnancy, and just so sad.