i’m sorry if this is a sensitive topic but..

TL;DR my mom doesn’t want me to tell my sister i’m having a baby or bought a house because it’ll make her feel bad..

my mom doesn’t like me, and hasn’t for a really long time. growing up i was never allowed to talk about my accomplishments because she said it’d make my sister feel bad. my sister is 6 years older than me and has kinda always been an “under achiever”. i hate to say that because i love my sister but she has actually fucked up her life more than once and my mom always has to fix it but she still thinks she can do no wrong.

i, on the other hand, apparently do EVERYTHING wrong. i was constantly held to crazy standards growing up. as soon as i turned 18 i left the house because i couldn’t take it anymore. i joined the military and my mom stopped talking to me for a year, which i was fine with but my nona(her mom) kept pressuring me to “try to talk to her”.. i did and again, nothing in my life was good enough for her.

well this past year i’ve had enough and started setting some serious boundaries. she began to get super annoyed with me because i would only let her into my life as much as i’m comfortable with and she wasn’t able to use anything against me anymore.

here’s where my new issue comes in. my husband and i were TTC for 2 almost 3 years and in september we finally got one that sticked ! we’re so excited, i told my mom and she told me i should wait to tell the rest of the family. i agreed because i’m not close with any of my family anyways. we found out its a boy and she’s mad because she doesn’t have any biological granddaughters (my half brother literally just had a baby girl in june but she doesn’t count it because he’s not her son..). then my husband and i found a house after looking for a year and it’s beautiful and in a prime location. we’re closing today so i shot my mom a little text because i’m excited and i wanted to share it with her. this is her exact response “yeaaaa, don’t mention anything to your sister. you’re going to hurt her feelings”

i- i just didn’t even answer her back, wtf am i suppose to say to that ???

how is it my fault my sister is 28 years old and can barely afford to pay my parents $400 in rent

wait the kicker is, my mom doesn’t think she treats us any differently ! literally everyone around her can see she does, my dad has even told her off about it multiple times bc wtf.

i have a migraine..