My dream is to be a stay at home mom. I feel like that should be a choice you know? We can work and have a career and be CEOs, and that’s awesome. Or we can be stay at home moms. That’s also awesome. But I get so much crap for wanting that. It was a deal breaker for me with my ex. I want it so badly that he had to go. He called me lazy bitch for it too like... raising people and taking care of the house is not laziness.

I literally want to be pregnant and barefoot in the kitchen.

I want to have babies, take care of them and even homeschool them. Why is that so bad?

It’s not that I don’t see value in myself, (I was told that too that my self esteem must be low)

I do see value in myself. I think I’m very good with children and I went to school for child psychology.

I have years worth of childcare experience and built my reputation in that field and I’m well known in my area because of it.

Obviously, it’s not a big shock that I want to make my own babies and take care of them, the only one besides their dad to take care of them. Putting my own children in daycare freaks me out. I’ve been asked before “as a daycare teacher would you put your kid in daycare?” And nope, I would not. I trust myself but some of the stuff I’ve seen other people do is.. I think I’d murder someone.

And yes don’t worry I always reported the stuff I saw to my bosses and appropriate actions were taken to resolve the situation. It shouldn’t ever have happened in the first place though and I don’t want to give anyone a chance with my children.

I want to do the shopping, the cleaning, the cooking, the baby making. I want to make home cooked meals every night for my husband and kids. I’m tired for being made to feel bad about that. I have never judged my daycare moms for working full time and having their child with me for 12 hours everyday. They were the hardest working women I’ve ever seen, literally I can’t explain how impressive it is when a mom drops her infant off at 6 am fed, fully clothed in cute clothes, in a clean diaper, and happy, while also having herself well groomed and dressed looking well rested with nice hair.

That shit, its impressive. But stay at home moms are also impressive. I will find a partner that wants this as much as I do, and I will do it. And that’s okay.

Just tired of feeling guilted for wanting this.