Opinions..

I lost my first pregnancy in September due to hydrops and cystic hygroma from Turner syndrome at 19 weeks. I got to meet her, hold her, love her. I’m just not sure what to say about being pregnant again. Do I call this baby #2? Is that okay? I’m so conflicted cause if people ask how old my other child is what do I say? It hurts to think about. I don’t want to have a conversation about it. And I don’t want to pretend like she’s here cause that would just hurt even worse.. has anyone else been through this? I’m also having a hard time connecting with this pregnancy as a separate pregnancy. In my head I still feel like it’s her in my belly. I even accidentally called this baby by her name.. I feel like when we know the gender and can talk about this baby by name it’ll help but I feel so bad for feeling this way..