Starting to feel like I don’t amount to anything

Maybe I deserve to continue to be lied to and cheated on. It’s been going on for so many years. Now I’m stuck because we have a new baby. And he’s still cheating. I feel so hopeless and foolish. Everyone tells me I deserve better, I’m just scared if I focus on myself and eventually date I’ll scare someone off due to my insecurities or I’ll deal with someone worse.