I am very upset and it’s stupid but it bothering me a lot

Trigger warning. I think I have PTSD from this like Im not kidding.

I can’t remember how old I was. Probably like 9 or 10. This was probably the most traumatic thing I witnessed as a child.

There was an ice storm and I don’t know where we went but we live right off the highway so we get off on our exit and at the exit we see a truck that’s flipped over, there was a man doing CPR on a girl who looked close to my age and she was laying on this baby blanket. He put a blanket down on the ice and put her on it and was doing CPR and my mother, being the human being that she is pulled over and helped him do CPR.

But I knew she was dead. It’s weird how you can be so young and know in your soul when someone is dead. What they were doing was pointless. I remember just looking out the window and seeing her pale with blue lips, and limp. she was gone. He had to have been doing that CPR on her for a while or was unconscious for a while and woke up and found her like that. I think she died on impact. Forever passed by and my mom was crying and she said I’m so sorry she’s gone there’s nothing we can do and he started screaming. He was screaming hysterically and it was the worst sound my ears I’ve ever heard to this day. HIS pain radiated through my body almost as if we connected in that moment and my soul understood his. This accident is the reason I think all of us are connected. There’s only one scream like that and I never want to hear it again, it’s like a scream that rips your chest apart.

I still use this exit. Just yesterday, someone planted a cross where that accident happened and put her name on it and when I got home I threw up and curled up in a ball and I have no idea why it is affecting me so badly. My

Body hurts and I don’t know what’s wrong

And I feel so wrong about this guys. I didn’t know these people, I didn’t know her. Her family put that cross up, her family hurts to this day for her. I am in no position to feel this way.