I wish they made a rule book

Newly single and have 2 babies. Me and my children’s father split because we are just fundamentally two different people. We split amicably. And yes I know I can be a single happy woman but I don’t want that. I want a family. I want a husband (part of the reason why we split). I want it all. Me and my kids deserve better. Not that I’m even ready to talk to anyone or dare but how do you even do it with having kids already. Thinking about it just scares the shit out of me...