Weird call

On Wednesday night at 11pm I got an incoming call from my ex. We broke up last Nov. It rang twice and it clicked. Soon after the same thing happened ring and click. I thought it was unusual and possibly an emergency since I knew through a mutual friend that her mom had a bad fall a week earlier.

I called back and she answered “what’s up?” And I was confused so I told her what do you mean? You called me first. She said she’d call me back which she did 10 min later and she was sniffling like she had been crying. She told me she had gone back home to visit her mom for two weeks but while their her aunts mental health deteriorated and needed to be institutionalized. She told me she needs to be back at work on Monday but needs to help out longer and doesn’t know what to do. I told her I couldn’t tell her what to do and that she needs to get a hold of her jobs HR department. She then says “well I just wanted to ask what you think I should do because you know me.”

After this she continued telling me her family problems with her sisters divorce and unhappiness of her nieces and nephews and how absent she has been from her family due to distance and how she wished she could also solve her siblings not on talking terms with her mom. And at this point I intervened for my own sake because I myself had health issues where I was barely producing energy to keep myself going. I kindly told her to check in with her jobs HR, that I hoped things got resolved with her family, and that I had just taken a muscle relaxer so I needed to get sleep. She thanked me for taking her call even after everything that happened between us.

If I would’ve stayed on the line I know she would’ve kept going with problems but I had no energy for it. That was a problem in our previous relationship where I had codependency issues and I would take up a lot of her darkness and I’ve come too far to work on myself. When we broke up she actually suggested we take a break first and I ended up ending the relationship. At the time she told me she was too independent and she was used to doing things alone and handling things alone and not opening up emotionally yet she called me asking me what she should do because I know her?

I understand we were both special people in each other’s lives at some point. But she took that care for granted before. What gives her the right to assume she can just seek that again? I didn’t give in except for being friendly with advice. Any advice or similar stories?