No sex?!

Has anyone ever felt like they just did not want to have sex with their boyfriend? He touches me and with my trauma as a little girl, my body tenses up. It takes so much work for me to relax and enjoy foreplay or sex but once I get going, i’m good. He has a small penis (maybe 3 inches hard) and it’s also a turnoff. I would never tell him this because he’s extremely insecure about it. I fake moan most of time. But as far as sex, we have sex 2-3 times a MONTH! And it’s all because of me. If he could have it his way, we’d have sex 2-3 a week. Any advice? Is anyone else going through this?