Should the bride pay? Am I wrong for being frustrated?

Question

My brother is getting married in June of next year so my sister in law is already preparing. Today she wanted to go dress shopping. I wasn’t able to go but my sister did go. We were suppose to look at dresses and did not plan on buying anything today. My soon to be sister in law instead choose everyone’s dress to try on and the place mind you this was only to look so no budget was discussed and then went on to tell everyone they had to buy the dresses today that she picked. She said everyone had to pay out of their own pocket. $240 a bridesmaid dress plus shoes she picks on top of that. Mind you her and my brother have plenty of money for this wedding and put part of it to a new roof and wanted my parents to pay for part of the wedding because her parents were. Am I wrong for thinking she should pay if she’s picking the place to buy the dress, the dress and everything.

Answer

Bridesmaids pay for their own dresses.

Answer

Nobodys wrong. If you dont want to pay … tell her you cant afford it or that you can not be a bridesmaid. She is wrong for saying buy today.  She should give u the details and you order when youre ready.., not today when the wedding is a year away.

Answer

Ive been a bridesmaid 5 times and ive always paid for the dress myself.

Answer

No, part of accepting to be in a bridal party is accepting the cost of your own clothing, shoes and makeup etc.

Answer

I’ve always paid for my bridesmaid dresses.

Answer

Haha no. You pay for your own dress. Not the bride!! I've been a bridesmaid 5x and have ALWAYS paid for my own dress. So either you pay, or you decline being in the wedding party due to finances. And remember- you have other financial obligations when you agree to be in a bridal party. Could be stagette and bridal shower costs. Hotel. Hair/makeup/spa (nails, pedicures etc). If this is a shock to you, step back from being in the party, or start saving now.

Answer

I was under the impression that the bridesmaids paid for everything they needed (dress, hair, makeup, shoes etc) and some things for the bride like a Bachelorette party. I think if you cannot afford such expenses to talk to her about it and see if you two can come to a compromise or back out of the wedding for financial reasons. It can be expensive to be in the wedding party. If it's too much Financially they should be understanding. And you can always attend as a guest

Answer

It is normal for bridesmaids to pay for their own dresses and actually quite common for brides to get 100% say in the dress. It’s a huge day for them and they are spending probably 10K or more on this day and they will want things to be to their taste/ liking. This is usually discussed before the day that you go to pick the dresses though, so I can see how you could be frustrated with it being sprung on you like that. With my bridesmaids I let them come with and have say in their dresses as long as it was the color of the wedding and all the girls could agree, but they did buy their own dresses. They knew ahead of time though that they would be buying them and I also told them that it would count as a wedding gift since I know their budgets are also tight right now. Maybe just try talking to your brother about it and maybe he can talk to her if you aren’t close enough with her to talk about it. Good luck!

Answer

I paid for my own dress.

Answer

When someone asks you to be a bridesmaid they should tell you if you're paying for the dress. It's not uncommon to have bridesmaids buy the dress, but it's usually discussed a bit beforehand, and it's usually like $80-$120. No one needs one more expensive, you don't want to outshine her. Haha

Should the bride pay? Am I wrong for being frustrated?

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