Hurting.

I am having such a hard time trying to enjoy this pregnancy, although I am almost 16 weeks already. Nothing seems exciting or looking forward to-ish. I lost my mother almost 2 months ago and she was my world and my bestfriend. I think from day to day, how am I going to finish this pregnancy with out her? Hell, give birth, without her by my side? I wish I was just a bit more excited about this baby growing inside of me. I feel so ashamed but I am so depressed