I am scared

Hi all, this is my 2nd pregnancy,

I went for my 1st scan yesterday and I am worried, baby was measured correctly 8w1d heart rate 120bpm. Doctor could not find baby on my tummy so had to do a scan from Virginia.

With my daughter we could do a scan on my tummy, and remember heart rate being over 150bpm.

She also made a comment that baby is small. Please don't judge what you read next.

My brother committed suicide and I stopped eating and drinking water, I would eat every 3 or 4 days, I started drinking a lot due to depression and anxiety.

I was on the injection, obviously it failed as I could not get the next injection as doctor informed me that I am pregnant. I stopped drinking straight away, and forcing myself to eat.

I found out at 6 weeks that I am pregnant.

I have had pregnancy symptoms and been cramping mildly, some days a little more.

I have to mention that I am *anemic

*low blood pressure

*depression and anxiety.

I have a referral for a hospital appointment next week and scarred that I have harmed my own baby.

The doctor and I are guessing that it is a boy, she said everything is fine for now.

What can I do to help my little bean, he/she saved my life, I want this baby to be healthy and strong.