Deflated 🥺

Feeling very deflated and alone 🥲

It’s my partners step mums surprise party tonight and due to childcare I personally wouldn’t have been able to get there until 9ish

But getting there late is better than not at all,

I was actually looking forward to getting dressed up and feeling “normal”

My partners just uninvited me because “there’s no point, he’ll be home 9:30 anyway”

He has a 100% track record of saying he’ll be home at a certain time and rocking home hours later 👍

He also told me today that he’s going out next Friday and the Friday after with his friends

That’s absolutely fine, but now our long awaited date night has been completely forgotten about, I just feel very pushed aside and just seen to be sat in with the babies

I’ve got a 2 year old also,

I totally lost myself after my first and only recently started to feel like I was getting myself back,

Little comments make me feel like my partner thinks I’m very boring and it’s draining me,

Like if someone constantly has this in there kind about you you start to believe it

I know I’m not the person I was before my first but I don’t feel like I’m getting the opportunity to get back to myself when someone has it so stuck in there mind to not think to ask me to do something because I wasn’t myself when pregnant with my first

(looking back I think I might have had pnd and was on medication for anxiety so my personality totally changed)

No point to this post , just getting drained of my partner thinking I’m boring 👍

I’ve also totally lost my business that I worked so hard to build up at 20 as he “can’t” have both the baby’s together because it’ll stress him out

So I haven’t even got that as me time or something I enjoy for the foreseeable👍

I totally lost all of my friends when I was pregnant with my first because of lifestyle difference

I wasn’t going out (obviously)

And they had no interest in staying in and getting a takeaway or something with the baby

And again I wasn’t invited out because I was then a mum and seen as boring 😣

I feel like this is the fun side of being a young mum and everyone around you is still young and going out but because you’ve got a baby(‘s)

You’re seen as not fun anymore 🥲

Poor me rant over🥲✌️