Am I crazy?

Question

My husbands family (his sister, her husband and their 2 kids under age 4) come to visit from out of state and always stay with us. I’m an introvert and this is extremely hard for me, not just because it’s them but because I need a lot of alone time- I’m in school and work from home. We bought a house last year and they have come to stay 5 times within the last year, for about a week at a time.. sometimes more. They also stay through Christmas. 
I love his family but this is too much for me and we have gotten into so many fights over it. He thinks “family is family” and wants to give them a place to stay whenever they need it, but they are not in a financially difficult place at all, and he’s also out at work each day while I work from home while they’re here. 
Am I insane? I’d love to hear how other people might handle this, or any advice, please 😞🙏🏻

Answer

You’re not crazy, that’s five weeks of the year they’ve stayed with you!? That’s insane. I’ve literally never met someone who did that. Your husband needs to set some boundaries with his family and they can get a hotel or Airbnb when they are in the area.

Answer

I have this same issue with my future in laws.  I told my fiancé (bc they bring their two dogs who I am really allergic to) that we have a small house with 1 bathroom, the dogs irritate my allergies for weeks after they leave, and they are constantly up our Butts, that he needs to set those boundaries for us.  And he did!  We are getting married next month and they are bringing their dogs but staying in a hotel.  Boundaries need to be set in a polite way.  If they get offended if you have been nice, that’s on them.  Good luck!

Answer

No it's your house as well and you needing alone time is perfectly fine. That's alot of time in a year, why can't they stay with other family as well or get a hotel?

Answer

No you’re definitely not crazy, I would tell him straight up how I feel and if he can’t understand that then he’s a dick

Answer

Girl, same. I am introverted and did not grow up around family. I don't understand people who have people over allllll the time and spend every waking minute w family. I would have to put my foot down about so many long stays especially with 2 little kids. Good luck!

Answer

I hate having house guests more than a night. I get flustered and need my own space. My in-laws see no problem staying a week+ sometimes which means I’m not myself for that time

Answer

You’re not insane but I would handle it differently. For example, my husbands whole immediate family is coming to visit us in the spring (parents, 2 sisters, and brother in law). We have a one bedroom one bathroom loft apartment. And they all assumed they could stay here and ordered air mattresses and such. I also work from home and cannot take time off. This is also my husbands home, and it’s his family I will have to live with the rest of my life. So I already let them know I would be at a friend of mines house for work instead of at home and that they could help out with groceries and cleaning.

Answer

You're not crazy. We all have different tolerance levels. You need to do what you need to do to feel better. Work in a coffee shop. Send them somewhere during the day. Make your husband entertain them in the evenings. Have him take them out to do things while you stay home. He needs to meet you half way.

Am I crazy?

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